My predictions for America if Romney wins. 

• Vacations will now be called ‘power down’ periods & birth certificates will include your ‘date of manufacture’.
• The Mars rover will be sent a coal shovel and furnace to run itself instead of using that ridiculous solar panel.
• Paul Ryan will admit he was one of the ‘bright eyes’ kids in the Total Eclipse of the Heart music video.
• Underwear sales, lots of them.
• The vice president’s residence will have a parkour course installed.
• The Wizard of Oz will be re-made, with the tin-man finding all the oil he needs on the witch’s federal lands.
• Skynet gets activated.
• Tea Partyers will celebrate like it’s 1799.
• In a single moment of bi-partisan agreement, congress passes legislation nominating Donald Trump as our official doucebag, joining France’s Gerard Depardieu on an international tour.